Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?
>>To improve his biteFrostbiteBecause vacuum cleaners are too heavyA fur coat that fangs around your neckBooberries>Fangsgiving>A cereal killerThey’re so wrapped up in themselves>A tromboneThey have bat breathA guy with very high blood pressure

A plumber attended to a leaking faucet at the neurosurgeon’s house. After a two-minute job the plumber demanded $150.
The neurosurgeon exclaimed, ‘I don’t charge this amount even though I am a surgeon.”
The plumber replied, “I agree, you are right. I too, didn’t either, when I was a surgeon. That’s why I switched to plumbing!”

For decades, two heroic statues, one male and one female, faced each other in a city park, until one day an angel came down from heaven.
“You’ve been such exemplary statues,” he announced to them, “That I’m going to give you a special gift. I’m going to bring you both to life for thirty minutes, in [...]

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. The next week the man realized that he would need his wife to wake him at 5.00 am for an early morning business flight to Chicago. Not wanting to be the first to break the [...]

Local ad for a plumber:
“We repair what your husband fixed.”
On the trucks of a local plumbing company in Pennsylvania:
“Don’t sleep with a drip – call your plumber.”
Pizza shop slogan:
“7 days without pizza makes one weak.”
At a tire shop in Milwaukee:
“Invite us to your next blowout.”
Door of a plastic surgeon’s office:
“Hello, can we pick your nose?”
Sign [...]