For Sale: Can’t afford to maintain anymore… Going to school. High mileage,
worn out interior, loud, lots of modifications, used to be fun but now its
boring, not very reliable, but stands up to a beating, test drivers welcome.
Best offer. Call Rob @ (905)822-XXXX, or if you want the car call (416)754-XXXX.

Einstein’s Theory of Junkfood
E = MC (Donald’s)
Einstein’s Theory of Boybands
E = MC (Fly)
Einstein’s Theory of Rappers
E = MC (Hammer)
Einstein’s Theory of Music
E = F (flat)
Einstein’s theory of cricket
E = MC (C)
Einstein’s theory of parks
E = MC (Arthur)
Einsteins’s Theory of Theatre
E = MC (Beth)
Einstein’s Theory of Biscuits
E = MC (Vities)
Einstein’s Theory of Tessellating Patterns
E = MC [...]

Being a man definitely has its perks…
1. Your backside is never a factor in a job interview.
2. Your orgasms are real. Always.
3. Your last name stays put.
4. The garage is all yours.
5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from having an elicit affair.
7. Car mechanics tell you [...]

We need = I want
It’s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now
Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to complain
Sure…Go ahead = I don’t want you to
I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron!
You’re … so manly = You need [...]

A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance in court.” said the Desk Sergeant. “No, no no!” said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been [...]

1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment for play, normally one club and two balls.
2. Course played on must be approved by the owner of the hole.
3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and keep the balls [...]